Wednesday, February 02, 2005

No Cause for Alarm

You know, in the old days - they would just kill the Pope and we would be off to the races. Now adays we got to listen to drivel like this.


Cause for alarm?

First - the Pope doesn't really look like that. They clearly airbrushed Cardinal Holds-The-Pope's-Head-Up-In-Pictures out of this shot. We have seen him in video. The poor man can't be allowed to age ungracefully.

Second - We haven't been able to understand a word he has said for 10 years. Of course there is no cause for alarm. He mumbles, and 20 cardinals rush to tell us what he said. His spinners could give George Dubya's a run for their money. (And only in the Vatican would you find someone to give Karl Rove a run for his money in deviousness.)

Finally, I miss the pope-mobile. I saw his holiness in the LA Colosium back in the 1980s. Back when he could still speak, stand and bless the crackers. Back then, he rocked and the Pope-Mobile was cool.

And have you seen the pictures where the doves attack him? The poor pope.