Hi, I'm Fred Thompson and I am running for President. You might remember me from such Movies hits as "Curly Sue", "Baby's Day Out", "Days of Thunder" or "The Hunt for Red October".
(sorry about the lines, that was before the lift).
But those movies (along with 20 others - most available from Amazon.com) are not why you should elect me President. Hell no. Everyone knows that Movie Actors are left wing nut jobs. No, you should elect me because I have years and years of managerial experience from my years on Law and Order. You see, Law and Order is TV - made people who are the salt of the earth, not some prissy left wing movie aficionados.
And if you have objections let me introduce you to my second wife, Jeri. She's already ran out 2 of my campaign managers, and she'll convince you I am deadly serious. (Plus she does a kick-ass impersonation of Olivia Newton John at the end of "Grease".
(Hey! Quit staring at those. You pervert. You'll have plenty of time later when Evita here travels the world as my ambassador of goodwill.)