Thursday, November 13, 2008

Ed's Discussion with Our Neighbor

Ed spoke with our neighbor recently and she asked some questions about the marriage issue that were good questions but no one has answered so I thought I would for our families here.  (PS, no more preaching after this.)
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Q: Why must it be Marriage and not a Civil Union?  (Also asked by Elton John in England).
A1: A Civil Union is not consistent from state to state.  In California or Vermont a Civil Union had almost all the rights of marriage, but in Oregon it has different rights.  In no state was it has complete as marriage rights.
A2: It is not transferable between states, like marriage is.  If you were Civil Union'd in California and went to Vegas for the week-end and your partner was hurt, you have no rights to see him in the hospital.  If you were married in California, you have all those rights in Nevada (where Vegas is).  This is different than a Civil Union in England, Elton.

Q: Why is everyone so hot about the California law, when it passed in other states before and this election?
A: Other states it was an esoteric question.  Those states didn't recognize marriage, so removing the possibility of marriage wasn't such a big deal.  The California proposition was "Repeal the Right of Same Sex Couples to Marry."  So people spent 34 million and their votes to write retroactive discrimination into the Constitution of California.  Trying to invalidate the marriages of 22,000 people is a pretty big deal.

Q: Why are you mad at Mormons?
A: The Mormon church pushed their congregants to donate time and money to the anti-Marriage cause.  If you did so, you showed up in the newsletter as "in good standing'", if not, no such notice.  So in total they donated about 22 Million of the 34 Million to strip away our rights.  Most of that money was from out of state.
In a bigger sense, people aren't taking it out on the Mormon People, but the Mormon Temples are huge edifices of worship that are landmarks in most towns.  (Mormons must get married in  the Temple, and only Mormons are allowed in.)

Q: What is happening next?
A: The Same Sex Marriage pro group will probably put a proposition on the ballot in 2010 (which I think is our next chance), if it isn't overturned in the courts.  Court wise, California propositions often go to court because they do something that is essentially against the constitution.  The last (famous) example was a proposition that required proof of legal status to attend school.  The courts considered that to discriminatory and overturned it.  
The argument that people are making now is that the proposition did not just "amend" the constitution to add laws (which a proposition is allowed to do), but it actually overturned constitutional protections (which is how the court gave us the right to marry) and therefore had to be put on the ballot by 2/3's of the legislature.  That would never happen as the legislature and the senate have both voted for gay marriage.
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Q: What about the right of the people to pass the laws?
A: Some rights aren't allowed to be voted on.  People weren't given the right to vote on slavery.  People weren't given the right to vote on inter-racial marriage.  You could make any number of annoying propositions that would pass in one state or another.  Personally I would ban cell phone use on the sidewalks and pass a law that forbids anyone married in a Mormon church from divorcing.  Luckily it isn't up to me.
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Q: Finally, is getting married that big of a deal?
A: It wasn't, until they took the right away.  
Imagine if your marriage was suddenly void, not because of anything you did but what you and your husband or wife did in the bedroom was "icky" to someone else.  "I don't want to think about what fat people do in the bedroom. Or what redheads do in the bedroom.  Or what people over 35 do in the bedroom.  Or people under 35.  Or cheeseheads."  Honestly, thinking about other people's sex lives is icky - and not just homos. .. 
You don't believe me.  Imagine your parents doing it right this minute -if they are alive.  Icky, right?