Heroin, Onion Soup Mix and Pot Pies

Ahh..

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Now I get it.

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Last night, quite late, Eddie asked me if he should have a Swanson's Chicken Pot Pie.

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Of course I said "No, it's too late to be eating." 

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Now I meant it in a good way.  He has been eating better, going to the gym, losing weight and he looks good.  I thought the question was asked with the purpose of me saying no. Honestly, I thought that was the point.

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So he said he wanted one anyway, and I argued with him.  Again, I thought that was my role in this... You know like when someone asks you to help them stop smoking and you are suppose to argue with them a little.  Well, I was wrong here - but let's not dwell on that.

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You see in the middle of the night, I had an epiphany.   Swanson Pot Pies are Eddie's Heroin.  And I say that with love and understanding.

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Understanding because Lipton's Onion Soup Mix and Sour Cream (commonly called "Onion Dip") is my Heroin.  I can have EITHER Onion Soup Mix (also used to Meatloaf and Stew) OR Sour Cream in the house.

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I can NOT have both in the house at the same time.  Because I will make Onion Dip.

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And then I will put the Onion Dip in the Fridge - for Ed of course.  And I will ask Ed if he wants some Onion Dip and chips approximately every hour on the hour until it is gone.

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Surprisingly Ed never wants Onion Dip.  And I get out "a few" chips and have a little.  Sometimes I will put out chips and dip when he is on the computer - just in case.  And I will watch TV.  Then I will get up and get a chip....  And then another... and before you know it the chips and dip is in my lap and I have no memory of them getting there.

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Remove the chips.. HA! I don't care.  I will eat celery and Onion Dip, carrots and OD, leftover tortillas and OD, Pita bread and OD.  When I am about to wash the dregs of the bowl out, I will like it off my fingers like a 5 year old with the cake batter.

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But I have learned, not to ask Ed if I can have Onion Dip.  I wait until he is tired and then say "I'm not tired yet." And watch whatever drivel is on until he falls asleep.  If the TV keeps him up, I will read.  And then, sneakily like an addict, I will find something to dunk in my lovely beige and chunky bowl of sour cream and love.

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I have finally confessed to Eddie and we no longer keep the two things in the house at the same time.  Every now and right before a football game I can go get Sour Cream and Chips and we will indulge my jones for a few hours.

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Oh yea, the kicker.  Onion Dip gives me some terrible gas.  But that is the cost of true love.