Thursday, January 27, 2005

The Problem with Comfort Food

The problem, as I see it, is in my comfort food. You see, this would all be easier if I ate chicken noodle soop when I was sick. Or if I had a craving for a burger. But no...

While it truely sucks to be sick away from home, the matter is made even worse when there isn't a Beef Enchilada within 5,000 miles (I think I saw one in Sydney once). So I have been stuck here in Hong Kong sick - with no Beef Enchiladas.

And I don't mean pulled beef with chipolta's. No way Jose. When I am sick I like a nice ground beef enchilada with red sauce. Bland and yummy. With refried beans, with cheese melted on top and rice next to it. And you shouldn't eat the rice and beans, but screw it you're sick so you goup them up with the tortilla chips (which you also shouldn't eat, but I said I was sick so shut up already little horrible voice in my head).

And, while it may not be a scrabble word, you all knew what I meant when I said "goup them up"".

I am just waiting for them to call me to my plane now. They won't. I know I am going to get diarreha on the plane. And there is no sleepy tynlenol here in Hong Kong and I forgot my ambian - so I am going to take Xanex and hope I sleep.

ps - After 12 hours in the plane, right before we land they are gonig to offer us breakfast. You know what breakfast is on Cathy Pacific. Omlet with mushroom gravy, or rice porridge (called Conge) or Dim Sum. Really if I have to face one more set of Dim Sum or Noodles I am going to heave.


So it is a little weird to be laying on your hotel bed in Hong Kong, sick as a dog. And, after working all day to watch a replay of the Wisconsin / Illinois basketball game. And I didn't know who won, so I got wrapped up in it, knowing the BF would be screaming somewhere 10,000 miles away.

That has been this trip, sickness - work and TV. It has been awful. Although I did get to see an amazing match where Llyton Hewitt (my guy) won a 4 hour 41 minute match 6-3, 6-2, 1-6, 3-6, 10-8. It went on quite late (like 12 minutes to mdinight on "Australia Day"), but the home boy finally won. And he is bring the sleaveless look to the tennis - you gotta like that.

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

Sick as a dog

Asian flu, Bird Flu. I don't know what the hell I have, but I am sick as a dog. Every minute I haven't been in a meeting - I have been in bed.

I am posting from a Conference Room in Hong Kong, where I just wrapped up a local meeting and Christina is in a Indonesia phone conference. I want to pass out.

I'm coming home tomorrow on the Thursday 4:35 Cathy Pacific out of HK.

Monday, January 24, 2005

Can I just say

My first big trip to Asia was Singapore a couple of years ago, and it changed my outlook on Asia. Well, I am back and it has changed my outlook on Singapore. Singapore is Asian just like Beverly Hills is North American. Technically, it is - but in reality Singapore is a western city. A RICH western city.

And it shows. Singapore is a big Urban City as designed by a benevolent Orange County dictator. Everything is pretty, functionaly and whatever isn't either of those is illigal.

But the people are happy, well off and the trains, metro, water and airconditioning all work. It is truely the best arguement for a authoritarian regime you will ever see. No one is downtroden. No one is homeless and the people are happy. There are Burger Kings, Outback StakeHouses, malls, hypermarkets (that Frenchie Calouflluer or however it is spelt). There are English bookshops. It is surreal. And pretty. You can never forget what a pretty city it is. It might be the only truely Tropical City I have ever seen that doesn't have a lot of run down areas.

I think I will be glad to get out of Dodge.

One more thing

One more thing.

I have a kick ass room here. It is on the top floor (32) with a view of death. There is a big marble bathroom, where the tub also has a picture window (the shower is seperate).

Apparently there were a lot of conferences here in Singapore this week, so I got an upgraded room. Upgraded at the Singapore Ritz Carlton still means something kids!

Busy - On a Business Trip. Is that allowed?

Well, so far this has been a very busy business trip. After flying for ever, I got up today (Monday) and started work at 9AM in the office, and didn't get out until 7:15PM. And, thank you very much, I was awake the whole time.

Could be becasue I slept all through the flights, but still, awake counts.

Some people from work are going to dinner, but they are going to a Japanese restaurant to have a special Chinese New Year Salad. I figured I could miss it and run up to get a boy-friend mail. He left me a nice note on the previous post.

So I deleted the nasty things I wrote here and updated it. He is a good bf.

Hello to all.

Saturday, January 22, 2005

Just FYI

There are few good things about flying 14 hours for work. Pariticularly when you have an hour layover and then get on a different flight for 6 more hours. But I digress. Or whine. Maybe I am digressing and whineing - you be the judge.

Be that as it may, one of the few good things is catching up with movies you really did want to see in the theater, but you're boyfriend thought they would suck. Usually your boyfriend is incorrect (like tell me something I don't know!), but occasionally he is really really right.

I watched "Sky King and the World of Tomorrow" last night. It was pretty. Pretty and quite nearly un-watchable. Gynwith Paltrow and Jude Law can, on the rare occasion, be quite good actors. Appartently shooting a blue screen with nothing to react to is not one of those occasions. If you can believe it, only Andlea Jolie seemed able to muster up some good scenes. And, since she was essentially playing a one-eyed, boyfriend stealing she bitch, maybe it came naturally.

So then I slept. You know for 8 hours, still have 4 hours left. So I watched I Heart Huckabees. I don't even know where to begin. It was dessperately bad. Mark Wahlberg - clothed. Jason Schwartzmen - unclothed. Start with that. Dustin Hoffman in a grey page-boy cut. And THEN it went downhill. It was a train wreck of a movie. At one point you have to ask yourself, why is Jason Swartzman and the French hottie engaged in sex that involves smaching each other's face into a mud pit. That is not foreplay. Only Lilly Tomlin came out of that okay, and I have to think she was doing it all with a big knowing wink and nod.

Well, I am about to transfer to another flight.
Everyone tell my boyfriend happy birthday. He looks beautiful (Joe Cocker high note) tooo mmmmeeeeee!

Thursday, January 20, 2005

Ed Thinks Poll Heading is Nincompoopery

Eddie saw this headline at MSNBC:

Poll: Nation split on Bush as uniter or divider

His thoughts. Doesn't the title actually say it all?

Also, after this picture of the Norwiegian Handball star, I am thinking of taking up handball. Or Norway. Or Norwiegian Handball stars.

Here is a pic of him in a more "natural" setting.

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

No one Enjoys Weather Talk

No one reading this enjoys weather talk from LA. The Santa Ana's are kicking up, my alergies are kicking up and it is a gorgeous 80+ degrees, so I will not mention it.

Speaking of no one enjoys... the odious Anne Heche is in the news again. Apparently Anne, the personification of unpleasent, has a new comedy series. Read the notes. Maybe I am missing something, but I fail to see the comedy of this.

HECHE OF A SHOW: Anne Heche signing on to star in True, a comedy pilot for the WB about a young woman whose boyfriend breaks up with her while she's in labor with their baby, forcing her to move back in with her parents, according to the Hollywood Reporter.

Ha ha ha, a woman has unprotected sex without marriage. The boyfriend, well not only does he not marry her, he breaks up AS SHE IS IN LABOR! HA HA HA hummmm. This is not something you can really blame on youth. Because while Anne Heche is many things, a spring chicken is not one of them. So let us rephrase...

I am not a prig or anything, but is this really funny? I don't know when they lost me on this. I don't think it was the pregnacy, or the boyfriend that leaves her. Or even that the boyfriend knocks her up, stays with her through the pregnancy (truely not a pleasent time) and then leaves at the worst time. I think maybe they lost me when the idea of forcing an older, obviously brain-dead, woman back into her parents house to raise a kid became funny.

Oh well, apparently I don't find this something that is hilarious so I will stop talking about it and not watch.

Friday, January 14, 2005

A Dog and a Golden Globe

The Golden Globes are on again this week-end. I love the Golden Globes. They were better when they were on a local LA channel, and everyone got drunk, but it is still a good time. Then it went a little upscale on TBS. And now it is on a big channel, but still fun.

I mean what better than a bunch of nervous people in a room with champange on every table. You know, you JUST KNOW, that someone is going to make an ass out of themselves. I love that.

Once again Ashford makes a friend. This time, Lynn's niece.

He is a happy little dog.

Thursday, January 13, 2005

Our Tax dollars could be better spent...

Or tax dollars could be better spent giving the people who plan traffic labotamies, rather than implementing their plans. Really, let them sit in a cornor and drool. It would be better for traffic movement.

Okay, let's say you have a city that is essentially divied into 2 by a mountain range. Like... oh I don't know... Los Angeles. And let's say that 4 million people live on one side .. let's call it the San Fernado Valley side.. you know just for shits and giggles. And, of these 4 million, most of the workers actually work in the other side of the mountains. Fine.

That is poor planning; but what nature devided, let man unite with 16 lanes of traffic.

So between the Valley and the West side there are 6 routes. Pacific Coast Highway (PCH), the 405 (many many lanes), the 101 (a lot of lanes) and the 3 Canyon roads (Beverly Glen, Coldwater and Laurel).

So we get a ton of rain. A ton! Well PCH and the canyon roads get washed out. That leaves a lot of extra traffic on the 101 and the 405.

So I have an un-lobotimize transit guy. What does he say, "I got a great idea! Now is the time to start tearing up the 101 over the hill." Oh yeah that will help.

Traffic, FYI, eh-sucks.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

I stand corrected

I stand corrected.

Apparently pricey, drunk and tawdry.

Apparently My Bitterness Does Know Some Bounds

1) I am giving up the uniter site. I have exhuasted my hate, fear and paranoia regarding Smirky, ActionMan and his un-holy alliance. I am healed.

2) Television, while not evil, sucks. Yes, this from me. The man who loved the dubbed version of Iron Chief, enjoyed both Laverne and Shirley as well as Mama's Family. The boy who watched Dune, the series. Even I cannot find much to love in the rathole right now. But (and this is a big butt), who cares? Eddie and I played a little Scrabble last night, Ronnie-Roo dropped by. It's all good.

3) I laughed at the following: A older guy is racing down Jefferson Ave in a beat up 1965ish Truck. He RACES to get in front of me when we have to merge because of construction. IN his haste, he didn't realize that the light is out ahead of him, and as he hits the breaks, the traffic cop waves him through. In a block we both have to stop at the red-light. I look over. He is on the cell phone, with his little "handicapped" plackard, drivng a stick (which means, as he shifts, no hands on the wheel). Did I scream, or yell? No, I chuckled. Good for Scooter.

Tuesday, January 11, 2005


Thank you, the sun is shining. Our hills have not, as yet (knock wood) slid. We are doing okay. I think everyone in LA is happy for a respite from the rain.

It isn't the mud-slides (though they looked bad on TV) or the idiot that was going to fast on the 5 and slide into the river that was getting to us. No. It was the constant, dreay, drug of grey! We do not like that.

By the by, I know that many of you have driving through LA and made fun of our "rivers" made of concrete. We do that because when the rains come - if it isn't concrete - this happens.

My guess is that they will make the Santa Clarita Creek into a concrete wash soon.

Monday, January 10, 2005

You haven't lived until

You haven't lived until you have been to a 50 year old gay woman's surprise party -gotten ripped with the bittter gals and then played "celebrity". Great moments with Mr. Lincoln...

1) Having a gal try to do a Britney Spears imitation by "dancing", and pulling up her sweater to show her belly. You think white guys can't dance. You watch a gay white woman!

2) Trying to have drunk women describe Georgie O'Keefe paintings. For some reason the gal decided to describe them in pantomime. She could use words but instead, rather ungraefully, made her arms to a foutain movement.

3) Convincing someone that "Hobo Kelly" and "Sheriff John" were local celbraties in LA, and not everywhere. The lady in question responded by saying "Come On! You don't remember the birthdya cake song?! Everyone had that!" She was told no, and insisted on singing it.
Put another candle on the birthday cade
We're gonna make
A birthday cake
Oh.. put another candle onthe birhtday cake
You're another year old todayyyyy

4) Having the clue be "She was an older tennis player. Gay." And watching the women go through every tennis player ever - except Evaungh Gollogoon.

5) Watch a dignified female City Planner do a Casper the Ghost impersonation.

6) Watched Ed tried to make a bunch of drunk gals stop giggling about the name "Beaver Cleaver" in order to continue.

7) Seen the Muffin do a Elvis impersonation.

8) Realize they have no idea who David Cassidy is ("he sings ballads").

9) Or Louis Armstrong ("I think he's a ballad singer too")

10) Or Annie Lexon ("who is this?").

Friday, January 07, 2005

Here's the problem with International Management

I don't mean to boo de hoo - poor little Scooter - but... wahhhhh!

You see every morning I come in to electronic mail.

I know view my electronic mail as a toilet bowl that the people before me refused to flush.

First I got just the lazy people. These would be my Asia customers. There notes start at about 6PM and go for about 10 hours. They work themselves up to a tizzy - only to recover quite often. So I get to follow their freak-out, and hopefully their chill-out through the mail. That's easy - jsut a quick flush (read) and off we go.

Then there is Europe. These are the floaters. Because you can flush and flush - but they still want to complain. Even when your answer gets them WHAT THEY WANT EARLIER THAN THEY WANT IT AND FOR FREE they aren't happy. Because you didn't think of them first. You flush and flush and flush - and still they float there. Finally you walk away.

And don't even get me started on the Germans. It's like walking into a toilet where people just missed the bowl.

How's your monring.

Thursday, January 06, 2005

Just when you are cursing your age..

Just when you are cursing your age - someone wasting their youth away makes you change your mind. Two of these girls, lovely young blossomes - opening to the world for the first time - afre friends of our. Cheap, drunk tawdry friends....

As for those of you who saw the pictures of the fish in Aussie-land - there were from a professional photographer. However, Lynnie and Eddie took some great shots with disposable hand held cameras. Here are a couple.

Fishes on the Reef

A giant clam (in the middle of the shot).


Wednesday, January 05, 2005

Mascot of the Month - Renaldo

The mascot of the month tries to capture the international spirit of cooperation during these troubling times. When countries have to pull together in order to save lives, increase globally understanding, reduce threats to freedom and find hot new stars for Soccer.

Christina Renaldo is the product of international cooperation. His is a Portuguese star of a British team, who is admired throughout Asia.

Susie's Great Gift Borgs Scott and Ed

So in Eddie's family, they (we - as I am part of the family :-) have a gift swap. You pick a person and give a gift to them.

This year Susie had me. She gave a great gift, a Barns and Noble Gift certificate (so I can splurch on some hardbacks aI have wanted, but can't justify). She also gave a little halogen reading light for reading in bed.

This was the perfect gift. I like to read in bed and Ed likes to bitch about the light. This goes on until neither of us are enjoying it. So I was looking forward to the light.

Well, a couple of nights ago, we go to bed, and watch a episode on DVD (Friends). Then Ed says he wants to sleep. Perfect, I will use the book light.

Well, I turn off the TV, so the room is black, and I grab the book light. It is very clever, you push a button on the side, and the light raises up on a hinge and then swivels around so you can focus it where you want. When the lights are on in the room, the little halogen light is barely visable, so I am assuming this will be perfect.

So I push the button, nothing happens. I forget that the hinge rises slowly and then the light comes on. So I am turning over the light, trying to figure out why it isn't on - when the little tiny light pops on.

And, by "pops on" I mean, of course, blinds me. That little halogen light is like those horrible BMW headlights in hyour rearview mirror that mean you can't see anything. The blue laser light shots into my eyes and I scream. As you do.

Ed opens his eyes, but he is turned away, so all he sees is the bedroom bathed in blue ambient light. "What the hell is that.." he starts to say as he turns over, and the light (which I have swerved away from my eyes hits him full force. He gives the old "AHHH!" yell as well.

Now the dogs, both sleeping in the bed, are awake, annoyed and worried by our yelling. They start to run around and bark, but I and Ed - blinded - cannot stop what we cannot see.

As our eyesight was restored, Eddie and I started laughing, which just freaked out the dogs a little more.

Lesson 1: Turn the book light on with the lights on, THEN turn out the bedside light.
Lesson 2: Don't need a gun if we are attacked by robbers - we can blind 'em.

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

Mascot Makes Good

Either Rusty Joiner got good karma from being our Mascot in December - or someone at Men's Fitness has a real h.o. for him. Rusty is coverboy again this month for Men's Fitness. Not for us. We will have a new mascot soon.

A New Year Begins - Doesn't Smell Different

This is a stupid time of year to start a "New" year. It's lously weather. Spring is miles away. People are just getting their winter colds and depression. Par -tay.

New Year should start in Spring. That's what I say.

Of course, I think the whole "winter" thing is a bad idea. Snow is for the mountains and Alberta - not for people.

Australia celeberates New Year's like crazy. I think it's because it is a happy time of year. The sun is out, people are in shorts and happy. They are excited by the New Year. Which of us sitting in rain or snow is like "Wow! I am so pleased to start a new year today!"

It is all a plot to get us to make resolutions to change. And if we are good, then the weather turns better. New Year's is like a threat. If you don't stop smoking / loose weight / call your mother more often / go to church then God's not going to bring Spring.

Happy New Year.