Friday, December 31, 2004

10 Years - And a gret gift

(Aussie link below)

Eddie and I are coming up on 10 years (around Jan 20). He got me the best picture in the whole world. We were at a gallery in Palm Springs this year - and we saw this.

It's weird - it's a traveling hotel type picture (slanted towards the abstract). It's one of the few things Eddie and I have in common from our childhood. We both stayed at these types of hotels. In fact I think my mom and dad and I would go to a ThunderBird Hotel in Indio every year.

We both remembering running across the hot pavement to the pool (in Ed's case the cold pool, in my case the hot pool). Anyway - I LOVED THIS PICTURE. And Ed got it and had Ron and Lynnie pick it up. You have to see it to get the full thang - but here is a shot of it.






t-birdsbig.JPG

Back from the land down under

Well, we made it in rare form. We had a good time. Will discuss more after sleep.

Here are the simple pics.


Tuesday, December 28, 2004

And so we say aloha to the reef

It has been a great time up at the Reef at Turtle Cove. We are leaving in about 2 hours to go to Sydney.

The flight here sucked. It was 3 hours late leaving LA (just long enough for me to watch the Bruins melt down and lose). Then we missed our direct connection to Cairns - so we flew thru Brisbane on Christmas Day - shops, not so open.

But we have had a blast here. We scuba'ed, we eat, we shopped at Kuranda, we dined in Port Douglas and we meet some nice people. We also meet some a-holes, but what can you do. A lot of the guest (I would say most) were from LA/ Orange County / SF and a lot were not pleasent. We made up for them by being charming.

That's all. Just wanted to say hello to all. Back on New Year's eve.

Thursday, December 23, 2004

The Other Side of the Family

I know, it is hard to believe that I have the other side of the family, but I do. I went down to Honey's to see Uncle Timo, his wife Connie (the movie star - I don't know why the Gilligan's Island theme went through my head) and the girls - Alana and Alyse. This is kind of pic heavy - but since I am gone to Aussie for the next week - what the hey.

Me and Alana (the blond) and Alyse. For those of you with a dirty mind - Alana is a freshman at U of A and Alyse is illegal - so eyes up gentlemen.




This is Uncle Timo and his wife Connie. She is way prettier than the picture.




And this is my grandmother, Honey. On my mom's side (real name Donna).


Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Oscar - Really?

Every year on the radio the Oscar race starts.

This all started with the music from Il Postino (the postman). Beautiful lyrical music that captured a bunch of awards for the (great movie). This has prettymuch continued as the artsy movie every year gets a Miramax classical music pitch.

This year it started on "A Very Long Engagement". Understandable.

But over the last few days - the radio has been pushing "Million Dollar Baby".

Let us ignore, for the moment, the unfortunate similarity to the movie title "Million Dollar Mermaid" with Ester Williams - undoubtably a more entertaining movie.

"Million Dollar Baby" (MDB) is about a a woman who becomes a professional boxer. A poor southern woman with no education - who must lean on men to help her. It stars 3 (count 'em 3) oscar winners in Hillary Swank, Clint Eastwood and Morgan Freman. It is offensive to southerns, poor people, women (who must depend on men to make it) and people of all ages with a brain.

Hillary Swank delivers arguable horrible lines ("People say I'm pretty tough.") in even worse hick southernese "Pee-a-pul sah Imah a purty tuff."

Clint Eastwood responds with his best Clint Eastwood impersonation - a growl that says "Girlie tought ...pause... ain't enough" You just want to say "do dah do dah" after it.

Morgan Freeman (token minority) comes off best as he isn't in the commercial.

"For your consideration" Phffbtt!


Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Older Quarterbacks shouldn't be allowed to play, but if they can...

I think that it isn't really fair that a player go to BYU, red shirt for a year, then go on a mission and come back and have 4 years of eligabiliy left.

However... if this is going to happen, then good for the Bruins.

Ben Olsen, number 1 prospect when he left high school 3 years ago, is going to be a Bruin. A 6'4" lefty Bruin quarterback. And a Mormon. So hopefully none of the recent Bruin "accidents".

And he will play with Spencer Havner (selected 1st team all American by cbssportsline.com and collegefootballnews.com and 1st team all cute defense by one scooter mitchell).

Ahhh... Spencer

Oh yea, one more thing. Eddie and I watched DodgeBall last night (thank you Eddie - I love my gift). And the mascot of the month was on the "bad boy" Dodge Ball team (he is "Blade"). He is also SHORT. My honey was duely deflated.

Monday, December 20, 2004

One is less torn

Okay, here is the general problem.
1) USC - the evil empire - is playing Oklahoma (the evil hick empire) for the national championship. In my heart of heart I must 1.a) root for the Pac 10 and 1.b) root against SC. Fro those of you in the Mid-West you can relate with the whole Michigan in the Rose Bowl against Texas (TEXAS!@) debacle.

How does one root for SC?
How does one change a lifetime of loathing?
How does one justify changing their emotions so easily?

Well, it helps if there is a picture of their Heisman winning QB half nakid at a beach last year.



And yes, he does look even hotter bigger -
scqb_big.jpg

Friday, December 17, 2004

Christmas Time and the nuts are out

You know, all over TV (Bill O'Rilly) and radio, the right wingers are attacking everyone who isn't Christian for driving Christmas out of the publich square and replacing it with "Happy Holidays".

1) Shut up. This isn't really happening. You are just saying this crap because you have already won your election and convinced the populace that "elites" are "trying to twist the country to their side."

2) I love the meaning of Christmas. It is a celebration of all that is good in religion. It is a celebration of Jesus, who preached love, family and committment.

I mean bascially Christian religion is a good thing. It teachs humility, chariety, truthfulness, and obligation to one's family and community. You don't have to believe in God, to believe these are good things.

I love Christmas. Not just the presents, and the tacky lights and making fun of Ed having to ride his bike in the basement. No, I love the spirit behind it. We are all family. I mean the human family might be a stretch for some, but people are capible of so much good as a community. Sure we have crazies, but it our job to stop them. I mean, if you believe that humanity is a family, then it is up to us to make sure that old Uncle Ali doesn't hit the sauce to hard before the dinner.

And you shouldn't make such a mess in the kitchen that it is hard to clean up (I'm talking to you Aunt Serbia).

I can't always worry about the world-wide family. But I can say to my family (related by blood, marriage or firendship) I hope you have a wonderful Christmas Season. Open your heart to the people that love you. And clean up your room damnit. This isn't a motel!

Thursday, December 16, 2004

Sunset

Sunset tonight on the 16th. The Santa Ana's blow all the smog over the ocean, making purty sunsets.

HO HO HO

Well, you have seen Faithie as a Badger and a Halloweenie tramp (she said rock-star - but let's not kid ourselves). Well she looks much sweeter at Christmas.

It could be becasue she is sweeter or it could be because her big brother looks like trouble waiting to hit his teens. Either way - get the last shot before they cause their parents heart ache :-)




Big Picture HH04big.jpg

And then the wind came

1) And then the wind came and all is better.

Yes ladies and germs, the Santa Ana winds have kicked up. Our Christmas wishes have come true.

I woke up this morning, open the garage door and the wind whipped through. Before I could even bundle up, I realized it was the warmth of the Santa Ana's. Nothing beats a hot (like 80 degree) wind at 8 in the morning.

I know it is earthquake weather. I know that more killings occur during the Santa Ana winds. I know that big rigs blow over (2 this morning on the 210). But it is all mitigated by the lovely lovely warm wind.

2) As for yesterday's post about the scary Grinch and other holiday wierdness, my Uncle Timo takes full responsability. He took me to see Yellow Submarine when I was very young and he thinks it might have scared me for life.

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Taunting Me...

So I am going to work this morning. I left early so as to make a 8AM meeting. I am actually on the 10 at 7:15. The 10 is moving at a ... very.... slow.... pace....

I am holding my annoyance in check, until...

They just finished a new sound barrier on the 10 and put a new sign on top. The new sign says, I swear.. "65 MPH speed limit."

Now, I may be wrong - but I think I am right. The last time I drove 65 on the 10 was about... oh .. 10 years ago.

I am exhausted

You know, I find this time of year odd.

First, I love the cards and things, but I get tired. And I don't like the lunches. Lunch with team A, gift wap lunch with team B, 20 year lunch for this person.

What happened to celebrating the birth of our lord with a good old Peanuts cartoon and then eating enough food on one day to throw up. Now we have the Grinch, and I did like the original, but then came Santa Claus' Workshop, Santa vs. the Martians. Now this year, the Polar Express - which is just plain creepy. That will give you nightmares!

As will the Grinch live action film. I tried to watch it on TV, and they had a back story. A BACK STORY for the Grinch. He is mucher tougher to dislike when you know that all the Who's down in Whoville were Who-assholes to him. It's like findingout that Santa isn't a kindly old man that likes giving gifts to good kids, but some pathetic pedophile working off pastlife karma.

Any Who (get it), our tree is sadly bare. We aren't really giving gifts to each other becasue we are going to Australia - but I don't like the nakid tree, so something will have to be done.

And how Christmas-y can you feel when you start your day with a discussion of how to put Arabic on ATMS, and you have to fill in on a conference call tonight at 6PM for an hour or 2 to discuss chip card problems in Chinese!

See.. creepy

Monday, December 13, 2004

Hot Italian Men

You want hot Italian Men? Well have we got a Calendar for you. Example.


Yes, dumb, young and full of ... God.

God? Yes, this stud of the month calendar is put out by the Vatican. Swear.

Other pics here.

Mexico - the good, the bad and the ugly

Well, let's start with the good. The condo looks like it will work. It is a great 4 bed 4 bath unit on the 5th and 6th floors. There is private access to a private beach (and we get our own little numbered thatched roof thingy. The price is great and it will make money. WE just need to investigate via a Mexican lawyer or notary (they are different there).

The bad. Well, there was nothing really bad this trip. Ed had a lot of heartburn, but we don't know why. I ate everything and loved it. I think Ed just didn't have enough tequila.

Okay, one other bad thing. The water had big waves that kicked up a lot of sand, so as you body surfed you got sand everywhere. EVERY where (if you know what I mean). Then, to rinse off they had a shower by the bar. You had to ask the bar man to turn it on, and open your suit to try to get the sand out. Everyone (me, other guys, girls) started out just trying to rinse, but that didn't work. Nope, pretty soon you were showering in front of the bar wiping sand out of your ass (or even less fortunate places for the girls) as people drank margaritas and pretended not to watch.

The ugly. Well, this is for mature audiences.
...
So on Sunday we go to the beach to lay out a little. We start at our beach at the hotel. We move down for drinks to the gay beach. Let us remind you that, it costs money to go to Mexico, so the gay beach is decidedly older than the ones you would picture. Eddie and I were well t the south of the average age. But no big deal. We are sitting, having a bite of food, maybe a little margartia or Corona.

Now on a gay beach, there is always too much flesh. Too many speedos. Often, they look great, more often they look wrong - just wrong. You can imagine that as the average age goes up, the wrongness level does too. Eddie and I wore square cuts. But there was a lot of bad speedos.

We looked, we laughed .. you the basics. And then, well we were stunned.

There was a guy, I am going to say maybe 70, in a red and orange speedo. The sides were red and the back and front were orange, and he stood in profile to us. He had that 70 year old ass. You know, it somehow manages to be droopy - and yet at the same time almost non-existent.

But it was the front that was amazing. This old guy looked like he had stuffed a banana squash down his crotch. It just this big wad of stuff up front. You couldn't miss it. And it wasn't (how to say daintily) "defined", it was just a big wad of flesh. At first, I assumed he had a goiter. But if you have a goiter, do you wear speedos?

Ed said he stuffed, but if so it was his beach towel. Maybe he had been in the sun and heat so long his parts had lost the ability to contract?

I don't know. But in any case there should be a limit to the age at which one can wear a speedo. No matter how in shape they are. And I say, whatever that age is, he has passed it.

Thursday, December 09, 2004

Christmas Pictures

So I love getting Christmas picture cards. So much that I added a like to them on the right.

Here is the link.

UCLA Wins NCAA WaterPolo Title

How do they get the horses into the pool.

That is the Score in the background. At it was hosted at Stanford.


Gez, and what is with the ugly facial hair?

My dog watcher just found out he is old

So it has been much easier to travel lately becasue we have the Erwin-ator. He is a really nice guy from Citibank, who house sits when we are gone.

Erwin likes to house sit because he likes the dogs and loves to go out in Hollywood. Erwin is a young 30, kinda hip and doesn't party like crazy, but parties enough. FYI - he thinks the house is a chick magnet.

So far so good.

Well Tuesday Erwin's sister (fresh out of college) invited him to a new cool Hollywood Club (CineSpace - very hip, very 10 minutes from now) where a friend of hers was playing in a band.

So they go see the band. It was kind of college alt rock. You know, the first song was about depression, the second was about suicide, the third was about breakups. And Erwin says to his sister "when do they play the happy songs?"

That was when he sister and her friends rolled their eyes and looked away. But that wasn't the moment Erwin realized he was old.

That moment came when the set was fianlly over, and they walked into the main room. And the DJ was playing Janet Jackson's Nasty Girl. And all the friends sighed dramatically - and Erwin was just happy it was a song he knew and at least kind of liked.

Age creeps up when you least expect it.

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

Hello from Bradley's House

We're out with Bradley-san for dinner at Lucys. I love Lucy's.

We are looking at Bradley's HBA getting ready for Australia. Bradley-san is a big Texan queen who LOVES product. Lord love him.

One last thing today

Okay, I am busy "cut & paste" 'ing Simplified Chinese text regarding ATMs between spreadsheets. I know I am a little bored. Sorry.

Last post of the day.

Remember that guy, Berg, from Two Guys and A Girl (for the twos seasons called Two Guys a Girl and a Pizza Place)?



Well he done grown up good. (Pic from Blade / Trinity).


Which came first: the duck or the idea

So I was reading about how the Aflac duck is going to be in the new Jim Carry movie. So far so good.

Then I read that Aflac has actually changed it's logo to include the duck. And I thought, did the change occur because the duck was so well recieved, or was it pushed and they knew they would change.

I just find it odd that an insurance company would change it's logo to include the picture of duck. Don't get me wrong, I love ducks. When I was a youth I had a duck, Clyde. It's just odd.


Scott Overcompensates

Okay, last night, perhaps... maybe... filiesch, I slightly over compensated.

I can't sleep when the heater is on too high. So when I went to bed, I turned off the heater upstairs, and turned the heater downstairs to, like, 57. Apparently our bedroom gets hotter in the warm weather and colder in the cold weather than the room with the thermostat.

So this morning, at about 4:30, I hear both dogs trying desperately tp curl into smaller balls of fur (which I have just had clipped off).

I get up and make Ed take Hastings and I take Ashford. I know Ashford won't sleep with me (he likes to be alone). Well the poor brown puppy snuggled under the covers, crept between my arm and my torso and buried his head into a pillow.

Oh my, I almost killed the poop-ster! I can see the headlines now, "14 Year Old Dog Killed by CheapAss Owner". Okay, tonight I will turn up the heat a little.

FYI - that "Reform Bill" that gives the new Intelligence Director controll over the Budget. A late edition makes that controll over 20% of the Budget. As Zela would say, whoo pee. (FYI - This is not a rant.)

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

See it's colder here

Now before you jump all over me, let me point out some facts on why we are freezing our butts off here in 40 - 50 degree weather.

As you may or may not know, the earth here shakes. That means that the buildings must sway and not break. So we can't use brick or many heavy materials. We use a little wood and plasterboard. And sometimes some insulation.

But we we ripped off the siding of our house in the remodel, there wasn't even insullation. Just wood siding outside, and plasterboard inside. Not so much protection from the weather. Likewise, we have the beauitful post and beam ceiling. It is gorgeous. Most of you have seen it. But there is no attic; just the roof. No insullation.

And as for heaters, HA! We have big ass air-conditioners, but little tiny heaters. My condo didn't have heat.

Many homes here have "ambiant heat". In case you don't know what that is, it is heat coils in the cottage cheese roof. Think about that. Electric heating in the roof. It is expensive, and only warm when you stand up off the couch.

Luckily we don't have a lot of weather. But when we have it, Scooter is not amused.

Then there is Ed who loves to turn on the heat to like, 90, at night in a room with the dogs and he and I and a comforter. I start to sweat, and turn over and he has thrown off all his comforters and covers and is snoring like an angel. An angel with a severely deviated septum.

Monday, December 06, 2004

Excited - A-Twitter - Can't Wait!

So, Eddie and I will go to Puerto Vallarta Friday / Saturday / Sunday, looking for a condo. As Ed says, "rental income" as I say, "retirement planning".

Either way the tempeture over the next few days is set at
87, 82, 86, 84, 87

Smile.

And Margaritas and tacos and burritos. ohhhh I love Mexico.

Friday, December 03, 2004

Ronnie Roo gets all the breaks

So I am working and I get a call.

ring ring ring ring

Hello?
Guess where I am?
I dunno know
Gold's. Guess how is working out next to me?
Humm (insert ex-boyfriends name).
Nope. (beat) The Mascot of the month. And he hasn't shaved in a few days.

I hate him.

Drama on Qubec Dr.

So this morning I get up to get in my truck. I am, as usual, balancing my water bottle, gym clothes (for some reason I only take out extra shirt and socks during the week. I use the same gym shorts – which creates this big pile of dirty gym clothes in the back seat – I don’t know why), lunch stuff and clicker. So it takes me a while to actual get in the truck.

I get the door open, and this white Land Rover (the discovery,not the big one) races down the street. My door is in his way, so I step back and close the door. No matter.

He has actually screeched to a stop at the house 1 up from us.

A little about that neighbor. He is a new guy. Nice enough. Gay and a PR person. I mean life, Edwina Monsoon PR type. PR PR . He is presently promoting an energy drink called (kid you not) GAY Fuel.

Well, he lives alone, but last night he had a friend. There was a blue Land Rover (the really little Freestyle) there all last night. Now maybe he wasn’t there (there is some GAY FUEL shin-dig this week) but maybe he was.

All I know is that the white Discovery stops, and out jumps an obviously annoyed boy. How do I know. Well, it is 7:30 on a cold morning, and the driver hops out “dressed” in a white bathrobe. That’s it. No shoes, no shorts (it was a floppy bathrobe), no service.

He marches out, and bangs on the door next door. There is discussion.

Here I fall down on my job – I admit it. I strain to listen, but it’s trash day and the beep beep beep of trucks throws me off.

Two seconds later he marches back to the Discovery followed by a golden lab, opens the back door and the lab jumps in. The lab, FYI, doesn’t live next door. He turns on his car, and then has to drive by me. I smile and wave.

He’s gay, so when a boy smiles and waves at you, you always have to wave back. It’s instinctual. So he does, floppy robe and all.

Thursday, December 02, 2004

I pass this on without comment

From the AP via the LA Times

WASHINGTON — Under detailed questioning by a federal judge, government lawyers asserted Wednesday that the U.S. military could hold foreigners indefinitely as enemy combatants at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, even if they aided terrorists unintentionally and never fought the United States.

Could a "little old lady in Switzerland" who sent a check to an orphanage in Afghanistan be taken into custody if, unbeknownst to her, some of her donation was passed to Al Qaeda terrorists? asked U.S. District Judge Joyce Hens Green.

She could," replied Deputy Associate Atty. Gen. Brian Boyle. "Someone's intention is clearly not a factor that would disable detention." It would be up to a newly established military review panel to decide whether to believe her and release her.

Scooter says, just to be on the safe side I would not be giving money to any charities if I were vous.

funny or happy?

Funny or happy? It's a good question to ask. Let's start with (drumroll please)....

Funny
So I am coming into work today I hear about the killer shrimp. What makes this shrimp so deadly is that it killed - after being cooked. Dastardly!

Apparently at a Beni Hana's in Long Island, some guy took his family to Beni Hana's for his son's birthday. The cook would occasionally fling parts of the food at them (that mean SOB, if only there was a way to predict that would happen - like any commercials they make or all the pictures in the restaurant). So this scary chef continues to fling hot food, and actually threw a piece of a shrimp at the father. He ducked out of the way.

Ahh. And therein lies the problem. You see the Beni Hana chairs don't have whiplash headrests. So he hurt his neck. Well, 5 months later he goes to a doctor (I think this was a "Dr. Quack" but I may have the name wrong). The Doctor convinces him that he vertebrates are hurt, so he must have an operation. He does.

Dr. Quack finds out that that "an operation" is very little like the game "operation" and botches the vertebra "fixin' thingy". The Beni Hana Trauma patient needs a second operation.

The second operation, while doing a better job of vertebra fixin', has the small (tiny really) down side of introducing some minor infections. From which the husbands dies.

The family, sad beyond belief, files a wrongful death suit at Beni Hana for a meal that occurred 10 months earlier.

The judge, faced with the legal precendent that requires a clear chain of causation, allows the case to move forward and go to trail. I wish I could be on that jury.

Happy
I love Arnold. Really. I know Eddie didn't vote for him, but I love him.

California politics sucks (like must politics) because it is dominated by the die-hards (on both sides). A big (nay - mammoth) cause is our politicians love of drawing safe districts. So it is a Republican or Democratic district (in CA of course mainly Democratic). So the real fight is in the primary - and the craziest, most left or right wing guy wins.

Arnold wants to change that. Wants a different way to draw districts. Yeah! "But Scott, " I hear you say, "the legislature will never go for that." Oh yee of little faith. You forget you live in California - land of crazies.

We have a constitution that allows the Governor to, wait for it, call a special election to vote on anything with 5 months notice.

And Scooter smiles.

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

Fun and Minor Rant

Before I run into a horrible all day meeting (Xanax already taken), let me say a couple of fun things.

1) The tamale festival is this week-end. Eddie and I LOVE a local festival, and the Tamale Festival is one of the best. The old Mexican ladies from every church in a 50 mile radius make tamles and bring them... yum.

2) We are going to Mexico next week-end to look into buying a condo - yeah! That means 3 days of yummy yummy food! I love Mexico.

3) The dogs are getting their hairs cut today so that is nice.

Minor Rant

I recall being told that the Marriage Amendments passed only effected marriage. Well, in Michigan the Attourney General is looking at it. A couple fo representatives have stated that the state amendment should invalidate State Workers Union's contracts - because they offer same sex health benefits. The canary wheezes.

Tuesday, November 30, 2004

Then go back to NewYauwk

Why of why do they interview idiot New Yorkers in the morning about the cold.

It has been really cold in the mornings here. Today it was like 41 degrees in Hancock Park. Since we don't have weather here (and after this week, who among us is complaining about that - hummm - Bueler - show of hands - I didn't think so). Anyway, since we don't' have weather here, the news station has to do a remote from the Starbucks in Hancock Park.

One must wonder if they really sent someone to the Larchmont Starbucks, or if they just dialed up Ginger on her way into the Studio. Or an elaborate ruse to get some good coffee. "Hey, send the Intern to Starbucks and get capachino's all around. Yea and ask some body what they think of the cold - we can write off the coffees!"

So anywho they ask this bundled up New Yorker. She says, with the total New York JAP accent, tempered by 20 years of ciggy-butts, "Me? I like the cold weather (cough cough). It's a nice change here. I miss the snow." Really twinkle-tights? You miss the snow? I got an idea - go back to New York. Lower the house prices just a little.

I am not saying that a fresh coating of the white death isn't pretty. It is beautiful, but 41 degrees isn't pretty. It's just cold. And we are not built for it.

Cabbaging?

So in the last post I enterred the word "capachino". Of course, it was flagged by the blogger spell checker. But they didn't give me the right spelling for capachino.

They did however offer "Cabbaging" as a possible solution. I had not heard of the term cabbaging before. I have heard of salad tossing (but that is really different - trust me on that slang).

Apparently cabbaging refers to purloining. As in, that tailor is cabbaging a yards of cloth. I think that is pretty esoteric useage (althought that was the dictionary example). Maybe it is a ye olde word(e).

Monday, November 29, 2004

From Ron - An outsiders perspective

Ron forwarded this to me and I thought it was funny. And mainly so true that we don't even think about it here.

You know you're from California if..............
1. Your co-worker has 8 body piercing and none are visible.
2. You make over $300,000 and still can't afford a house.
3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English.
4. Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Breeze.
5. You can't remember........is pot illegal?
6. You've been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.
7. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown, and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian. (Scooter: this is really an SF thang)
8. You can't remember......is pot illegal?
9. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears. (Scooter: again an SF thang. A more LA thing is to use the valet, everywhere.)
10. A low speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.
11. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.
12. A man gets on the bus in full leather regalia and crotchless chaps, and you don't even notice. (Scooter: we don't get on the bus in LA at all)
13. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 am at Starbuck's wearing the baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney, really IS George Clooney.
14. Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.
15. Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber is gay, the woman who delivers your mail is into S & M and your Mary Kay rep is a guy in drag.
16. You can't remember.....is pot illegal?
17. It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news station: "STORM WATCH."
18. You have to leave the big company meeting early because Billy Blanks himself is teaching the 4:00 pm Tae Bo class.
19. You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy with their cells or pagers.
20. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work and hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents. .
21. HEY!!!!!! Is pot illegal?????
22. Both you AND your dog have therapist....and lastly...
23. The Terminator is your Governor.

It's bad when Hazel is the better name of the 2

So Julie Roberts had twins. In the long and illustrious naming conventions used by celebrities the world over, she has picked asinine names for the twins ( one hopes they were a girl and a boy).

For the girl, Hazel. Not horrible really. She will be the second most famous Hazel ever (you know, after the Maid).

But the boy. Phinnaeus. Really, Phinnaeus? Pronounced fin-e-ous. Does it pass the two tests.

#1 - Phinnaeus, get in here and do your home work!
Not bad. It's okay here.

#2 - Oh Phinnaeus, that's it - do it there. Give it to me big Phinnaeus. Don't stop Phinnaeus.
Yeah, Phinnaeus fails that test. Badly. And his middle names, not much better. Phinnaeus Walter Moder. PW? no. PM? Really no. Walt?

Julie, you are a mean mean woman.

However, you still after the worst. Ann Heche is still the worst mother. Her son is named "Homer Heche Lamphoon".

Wednesday, November 24, 2004

So - Scott what up with going out to the desert

So I hear you say why haven't you gone out to the desert yet. Well here is a big picture of why we are waiting. bigtraffic.JPG

If that is too much, then here is a small picture of the reason (red is less than 5 mph, yellow is less than 20 mph, green is at least 35 mph).


Tuesday, November 23, 2004

I have found a way to pay for a new house

So, those of you that know me know that I pride myself on my ability to fund various ventures that cannot rightfully be justified (for example, the Jaquzzi will never hit a dollar a wear). But I have been surpased in my ability. Nay, I have been proven a piker. I need to think BIG.

I have agreed (with myself if not with you) to contain my anger and rants at the present occupant of the tacky neo-colonial building at 1600 Penn to off-site. And I have upheld my part of that bargin.

This is not a slam, nor a rant at those pesky Republicans. No. This is a acknowledgement of job well done. This is a trick (strike that - say "treatment") of funding that makes even studio accountants say "damn - I wish I thought of that". From the Washington Post.

Republican budget writers say they may have found a way to cut the federal deficit even if they borrow hundreds of billions more to overhaul the Social Security system: Don't count all that new borrowing.


As they lay the groundwork for what will probably be a controversial fight over Social Security, Republican lawmakers and the Bush administration are examining a number of accounting strategies that would allow the expensive transition to a partially privatized Social Security system without -- at least on paper -- expanding the country's record annual budget deficits. The strategies include, for example, moving the costs of Social Security reform "off-budget" so they are not counted against the government's yearly shortfall.


Monday, November 22, 2004

FYI - We are very mad at the Badgers

Just as an FYI - we at the Neppl/Mitchell household are very mad at the Badgers.

Earlier in the date, Ohio State had done it's job and beat Michigan. All Wisconsin had to do, to go to the Rose Bowl, was beat Iowa (actually had they beat Michigan State last week-end it would have also been wrapped up).

Wisconsin, for some reason, forgot to show up. Their defense tackled like the Bruins (and not the butch UCLA Women's Rugby Team, but like the girlly Bruin Men's football team). And their lead ball carrier was hurt - or weak - or something else.

Ed was not pleased. Ed feels, and one cannot help but agree, that if you are too weak to play - don't suit up. Don't sit on the sideline and have the coaches and teammates beg you to play only to decline like a little bitty baby. Hell, Roy was mauled, and he got right back on the tiger.

Anthony Davies! phft!


I have to go with Eddie here. He doesn't look hurt.

(update: SM) Our expert (former AD Amiot) agrees.


Snow

So we are driving back from Palm Springs yesterday and we drive by snow. You know, it was up in the mountains,a nd it snowed last night. Pretty.

Then we were at Beaumount and the signs still had frost on them at noon. Pretty and pretty wierd.

Then we got to Calimesa (2,400 ft) and there was snow everywhere. The shoulder of the road, the ground, the golf courses, everywhere. Kids were sledding in it (on cardboard - but I think the end result is the same).

Nice to be home from Vegas. More later.

Monday, November 15, 2004

A Pretty Day - a long drive

Well team, it's a lovely day in LA (high 70s / low 80s). I am off to Las Vegas for work. I have international team meetings and a banking show. A banking show! Scooter and bankers at a conference. It's like Bizaro universe.

This week-end was almost a lot of fun. We had a great dinner with Ed's old employees on Friday. We had a fun night with an old employee of Ed's from Disney at her house and then saw a really pretty cool play in the Valley (yes - we ventured to the Valley during the week-end).

Sunday we took a drive to San Pedro, ate at a cool little local hang-out, then drove around Palos Verdes Pennisula. You could see Catalina really clearly. Bradly came over for beer and cards in the evening.

Then why only almost good? Ed's team did not do well at football Satruday. It cast a stinky pall over the rest of the day.

Friday, November 12, 2004

Didn't she save any money

Poor Diana Wiest. She has an Oscar for goodness sake! She is a serious good and seriously funny actress (Don't Speak!). She is now playing the Secratry of Energy in a TV weather disaster movie (really).



She should use a little more Energy and a little less Secretary!

From the fire

Eddie saves a cat from the fire (I saved a dog).


Thursday, November 11, 2004

Posted from the Gay Sports Site

Sometimes a picture is worth a 1000 words... I don't know what words thdey would be, however.

FYI - this is from a pig carry contest in New Zealand. Go All Blacks!


Wednesday, November 10, 2004

Okay - Here is the story

So, fyi - I am not going to my Grandmother's service at her church.

Instead, we are looking to get a headstone for Grandma all visit when it is put up.

Why not the service.
Okay - I am not whining here. I am just stating the facts ma'am.

The people at my Grandma's church actually like me. I mean I was nice to Zela and everything. Zela and I had a much better bond than they do with their kids and grandkids. The Bible study even made grandma ask me questions about gay people when one of them is confronted with a family memer. Zela and I talked about choice vs. born that way. We talked about monogamy, the possible of love, etc.

But, at the same time, the church is evangelical. At my Dad's service (same church) I was sitting with my grandmother, next to Sheila. Sheila was openly my father's girlfriend. She and Dad dated, went to church things together and had very open displays of affection. Sheila, FYI - married. Now her husband was in the vetern's hospital and would not come out of a coma. I don't blame Shelia for hooking up with my dad. She needed the vegtable husband's money to put the kids through college, so she didn't divorce him.

Okay, picture us at my Dad's service. They don't want Ed to sit with me, but they don't say it. I sit with Zela, and they flood the bench.

Now Sheila says goodbye by singing a song (poorly) and everyone weaps.

Now the preacher gets up and says my dad asked him to talk directly to me. He says, "It doesn't matter how good a person you are. It does not matter how good you are to your grandmother. It does not matter how much you take care of your father. If you don't accetp Jesus as your saviour and renounce your life of sin you will burn in hell."

Sheila, next to me, is nodding, and turns to give me a little smile. Sheila! The married wife of a vegtable who spent the last year screwing my dad and putting ads in magazines for 3 ways is going to heaven. Scott - going to hell.

How did I react. How would you react if your hard of hearing Grandmother sat next to you and just lost her son? You would do what I did and not say a word. I held Grandma's hand as she wept and didn't listen a word the preacher was saying.

After the service Ed, Patrick and I left. We got drunk and went to a dog show.

I will not repeat this with my Grandmother. But I will tell you all when we are having brunch and dedicating the headstone.

Tuesday, November 09, 2004

What is the best way to learn of a fire

What is the best way to learn of a fire? (This is not an esoteric exercise - the neighbor across the street and 4 houses down burned up last night at about 10:30 PM.

Option 1) As Ed and I did, suddenly watching the flashing lights of Fire Engines race up the street.

Option 2) As Elizabeth did, watching the 10PM local news and seeing the house 1/2 way up the block on fire on the TV?

Option 3) As Bill did, having a drunk Scooter and Ed run up to your door, demand the neighbors key to save the animals next door to the fire?

The fire didn't spread (we have a quick ass Fire Department in the hills). But I did learn a little too much about some neighbors (like who was late because they had to go back inside to put clothes on). By the way, the annoying rhymes with witch next door with the barking dogs couldn't be bothered to come outside and see if everyone was okay. She made her husband move their cars.

FYI - Eddie and I weren't that drunk, we were winded from running to Bill's. And, we did get the animals out - a big hairy brown Saymoed-ish dog, a little Chiwalla and a cat shoved in a crate too small for it. Eddie spent most of the next hour making sure the little Chiwawa was okay. He was kind of shaky.

Monday, November 08, 2004

Ed has issues too.....

Apparently the election has taken its toll on Edwardo as well. He just lets it out differently.

So we are driving back from the desert yesterday, amid the idiots. There is always at least a few idiots who drive like nincompoops. This one big black Expedition (henceforth referred to as BBE) is racing through traffic. BBE is cutting across lanes, cutting off cars to gain one or two car lengths.

Through a 3 lane section of hilly construction, BBE caused a near accident with a minivan, and two seconds later with a Mini. The BBE could see nothing.

Ed, if you don’t remember, hates BBE’s. It was a BBE that ran him into the center concrete about 2 years ago. Worse, this BBE, driven like a bat out of hell, had a “Viva Bush” sticker in the upper part of the rear window further giving us cause for hate, and obstructing the rear view. Apparently the driver lived by the Italian Racing Creed – what is behind me is not important.

Well due to a poor choice, the BBE was stuck in the number 2 lane as Ed and I passed in the number 1 lane (the fast lane). As we pass the idiot we see the driver. An pretty, face lifted, dyed blond haired, big perky fake boobed woman yacking into a phone she held with one hand. Yes ladies and germs, she was driving at Mach 1 (actually 80 MPH), cutting people off while on the phone.

So she drops in behind Ed as he races by, and Ed turns into Bad Ed. He slows down to ape the speed of the driver next to, and just behind him. So she cannot pass. She must slow down to rip around the second car, and in that time Ed has speed up and is way ahead of her again. She then decides to ride Ed’s ass.

Ed slows down until she realizes she must back off. This goes on for a painfully long time. Fro those of you that know the road, it goes on from Redlands (before the 215), to Etiwanda at the 15.

Finally at the 10 and 15 interchange, the traffic loosens up and she races past us. I have the phone in my hand to taunt her. Ed is ready to flip her off. As she whizzes by, she holds a piece of paper in the window. On it is written “USC”. She is still on the phone.

Ed and I laugh – she looks over at us and laughs with us and we all go on. Ed’s license plate says UCLA and WISCONSIN. Somewhere in her attempts to run around us, she has found a blank piece of paper and a marker. She has realized that the thing that would piss me off most was USC (they won and UCLA look like dog turd this week-end) and wrote USC on it. She did all this while driving like a mad-woman AND WHILE ON THE PHONE.
You cannot hold a grudge against someone like that. Even someone like that who voted for Bush.

Sunday, November 07, 2004

Did you see Ray..

So we are watching Entertainment This Morning or some such happy horse pucky, and they are interviewing Jamie Fox about the biopic "Ray".

If you don't know "Ray" is the story of Ray Charles, and it was completed just before Ray Charles died.

So they say to Jamie Fox, did Ray Charles see it. And Jamie Fox says yes, right before he died he did see it. And he loved it.

And all I could think was. See it? Is it me, or was Ray Charles blind?

Must be a helluva movie.

Friday, November 05, 2004

Enough is Enough ..No More Tears....

It's not just a bad Donna Summer / Barbara Striesand duet - it is today's mantra. I am tired of being in a cranky mood.

Let me count the good things....

1) My Eddie - he doesn't like all the pictures of himself, but he is a great guy.

[SM: Updated after an anonymous comment]

2a) My Mother - warm, wonderful and witty. I would, of course, noted her when first posting, but I think of her as a friend. (Step lively folks - it's getting deep)

2b) My friends. They, like myself, are slowly getting over the election. Liquor helps.

3) A world where Jeremy Bloom, Alexi Nemov, the Coors Twins and Jessica Simpson all like to flaunt it cannot be all bad.

4) Karl Dorrel - horrible coach of UCLA - has finally proved his worth. If you can't read the LA Times - don't worry. The short answer is that a 21 year old - 4 years of eligibility - amazing prep quarter back just back from a Mormon mission is visiting LA. He is thinking of attending UCLA because he likes our offense. You go Bruins.

Thursday, November 04, 2004

Was Going to Rant about Prius Owners...

So I was going to rant about Prius owners, but I decided that I am just in a crappy mood because of the election and the dead grandma and everything else and I am rung out. So I won't rant.

To get me wrong, it was going to be good.

For example, in driving to work today I was sneared at by another Pri-Ass, as I now refer to Prius owners. And in his snear I saw much that was wrong with the world.

This little stuck up queen, with his tight little navy blue sweater and the button down shirt peeking out of it believes that the fact he drives an ugly hybrid give him the right to give me in my truck a sdirty look. Honey I was fighting for the right for you to be an out and snippy queen when you were in your upper middle class house with direct from Bullock's Crib-with it's baby freindly netting and the Valium popping mom. Do not give me atttitude.

Then I figured it out. Pri-Asses buy their ugly little cars because they are ugly and stand out. Honda makes 3 hybrids, Ford makes a hybrid SUV, but these are trendy enough. Because they aren't OBVIOUS. The Prius and the Pri-Asses stand out because there car is so ugly. Oh and they had to pay extra and ... shhh... "get on the LIST" to get one. Bite Me!

Yea, the world owes you a big fat debt of gratitude because you are enlightened enough to buy a Prius. I got a better idea, Sparky. Why don't you take the bus. It runs right down La Brea. I sure your sweatered hide would save even more gas on public transportation.

See - I am a little on edge right now. So not the best time for a rant.

Hey, did you see know that the election is over they found out that the explosives were stolen after we took over the base? I heard this from KNX Radio and this was the next sentence. "President Bush's Representative said that he will extend his hand to the democrats in the next term. But cautioned that he wouldn't extend it very far." Really, that is what he said.

To quote Rufas (Wainright) - "Oh what a world we live in."

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

And then the boyfriend makes me smile

By sending me a big pic of Jeremy Bloom from his website. Football and Skiing are good for the chest and arms.


Picture with more of the Bloomster in it here bloombig1.jpg.

And Jeremy's website here

And then this...

Well, that didn't last long.

Really I tried. Please read the note below. I swear I tried. Then I see this picture.


This is who you guys voted for!

This is a draft dodger that convinced Americans that John Kerry (decorated veteren) was a war criminal.

This is a man who took a national surplus and turned it into the biggest deficet in history. THEN has the balls to tell us that Kerry couldn't pay for his plans.

This is a man who promised to unite the country. Then used 9/11 to atack anyone who disagreed with him as a traitor.

Smirky the Chimp. This is who you voted for?
Great.

What we owe...

Well, that was a fun 8 months.

So, at least it it over. And as a good American I will support the President and the Senate. It's a great country to live in. And, he won the popular vote. Clearly people see something in him that I don't.

Maybe he will surprise those of us that are afraid of him. Maybe the Republican attack machine has finished with it's flurry of attacks on "liberals", "the gay agenda" and "tax and spend democrats". Maybe we can get on with the business of being Americans again.

I hope so. Congrats to the Republicans I know.

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

A Truely Guilty Pleasure

Okay, I admit it. I am a bad person. But I can't stand people on cell phones who drive poorly. I mean bad drivers - okay. Cell phone drivers - okay. Bad and on the cell phone - no.

So remember when you were little and driving and you saw a baby carriage in the crosswalk and you yelled - "2 points!". Well, you never did it. I mean no one really takes out a baby carriage.

But I do honk at cell phone drivers - and if you fluster them it is a point. If you cause them to shake there head and pull it out of their ass - 2 points. If you get them to hang up 5 points.

The other day, I am driving down Olympic and there is construction. At La Brea, the 3 lanes east bound and left turn lane turn into two lanes - no left turn signs. What happens?

An idiot and obviously kept blond in a brand new Range Rover stops in the middle of La Brea, THEN TURNS ON HER LEFT TURN SIGNAL. She is, of course, on the phone. This, ladies and germs is in the middle of rush hour. Olympic and La Brea is a busy busy place.

I honk. Excessively.

She waves me around. I honk again. Others join in. She finally shakes her hands like she touched a hot oven and drives on to the next street.

Where there is still construction and giant NO LEFT TURN SIGNS. Once again, Queen of Mensa stops, puts on her blinker to turn left. Once again we all lean on our horns.

She finally drives one more street, to where there is a left turn lane. We all stop at the light, and she rolls down her window. It turns out it, she is really a he. A long blond haired kept he (like this 23 year old could afford a brand new Range Rover) and he yells at me in a nasty voice, "What do you want me to do?"

I reply, perhaps too loudly with only a touch of spittle flying out of my mouth, "Hang up the ****ing phone and drive!"

He rolled his window up quickly before the crazy queen in the pickup ripped his head off.

I beleive that was 8 pnts in total. *snap*

Monday, November 01, 2004

Joey MacIntyre? Mascot: Are U Serious?

Yes, ladies and germs - I choose Joey MacIntrye - formally of hte New Kids on the Block. Because he has overcome that to star in Wicked! And he was good.


Back from NYC

So we had planned a week-end in New York quite a while ago. We decided to go, as really there isn't anything else I can do for Zela now.

It was quite a fun week-end. We saw WICKED!, which was a killer show on Broadway. It was great. Eddie got us a private tour of NBC studios in new York. We walked on the Nightline set, the Sports Set (where they told us they didn't really want football anyway), and the Saturday Night Live set. It was really fun. We also bumbled around the city with Lynn and Muffin.

And I realized I will my Grandma a lot. I was taking pictures of us as well as buildings and things when I realized that I really don't have anyone to show these too. I mean I will show them and all, but the point was often to show Zela - for whom my pictures were a window into a world that she didn't share but did help make possible.

And coming back on the plane I looked at Ed and was in love. But you know you can only say "I love you" or "Thank you honey" so long before you sound like a blathering idiot. So, in my brain, I started to sing the song Zela always sang to me.

I love you, a bushel and a peck.
A bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck.

And I realized that she sang that to me because she didn't want to say I love you all the time and sound crazy.

So it was a good week-end to get away. And it is good I will always take her with me.

Thursday, October 28, 2004

Hummm

Well, humm...

I don't really have all that much to say. Eddie has been great with regards to my Grandma. He has answered the phone when the old nosey ladies haver been a pain in the ass ("I didn't know Zela wanted to be cremated." " When are you going to have the service?" "What is happening with her old walker?")

I have been kind of checked out. I just go home and want to sleep all the time. But it is getting better.

I had lunch with an old freind today I haven't seen in years (Patrick). We had set this up a few weeks ago, but it was a perfect time to see him. And it was at Islands. A perfect place to have 2 margaritas.

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

So My Grandma Passed Away

So my grandmother passed away today. I hate to talk. I hate to talk on the phone. I don't want to go to a service right now (long story). But I want to say I love you Zela.

My grandmother was a trooper. She had two kids, one was my dad - who put her through the ringer, and one was down syndrome - which is a blessing -but don't let anyone kid you. It is hard hard work 24/7. In between it all she had to watch out over me.
My grandma taught me about family and kindness. About turning a blind eye when you needed to, but being there when you had to be.
When Mark died, my Grandma talked to me about losing her husband. Because she and her friends had talked about it. And, to her and the bible group, they didn't understand the gay thing, but they understood the loss thing. And she told me I would be okay. And we laughed because we both knew it sounded like a load of (in her words) horse shit.
When I meet Eddie, no one was happier than her. Well maybe me, but you know what I mean. She survived her husband and both kids. She even survived Ed's family :-). She was 93 years old, and I think she was ready to go. Everything was giving out on her. Her eyes, her hips (old and replaced), her ears.
But to the end she loved life. She loved seeing me, hearing about my trips and eating with Ed and I.
She never quite understood my traveling, but she knew I liked it. And so she liked to see places through my eyes.
I wouldn't be here without her. She saved me in a ton of tangible and intangible ways. When I was little and hid from the world, she made me stay in touch with my dad (when I lived with my mom) and my mom (when I lived with my dad). I remember that I would have nothing to write my mom (I was like 8) but she would help me to pick out Snoopy cartoons to draw and send to her. Family was important to her - even if she didn't understand how her son's had fallen apart.
I see my mom and my dad in me. I see their sense of fun and adventure. I see their drive. Of my grandmother I hope I have her grit and her outlook on life. And he smile when things go well.
I will miss her.
(no comments on this one - give your grandma a call)

Mr Wizard is a bad bad man

Remember when you were little and you watched Mr. Peabody. And the kid would always be sent in "The Waybck Machine" to visit somewhere. I loved those shows. But they have destroyed me for life.


Why, one asks? Becasue deep down inside, I know that somewhere is a little dog, watching the wayback machine. And no matter how many times at work I scream "Help Mr. Wizard. I don't want to work here anymore." That damn dog won't way back me back.

If I every meet Mr. Peabody, that is one dog that is going be fixed tout sweet!

Monday, October 25, 2004

My New Password Follies

So, I get a message this morning that I have access to personnel information. Therefore I have to follow the new password rules.

1) Logon on to the password change site
2) Use the change button
3) Enter the encrypted password from your electronic safe/card within 20 seconds
4) Retrieve the first half of your password from the site
5) Logon to you mail to get the second half of your new password
6) Login using this new password within 30 minutes or it will be locked
7) Do note write down the new password anywhere

That really isn't that difficult with your safe/card.
I ordered my safe card in November.
November of 2003.
It has yet to arrive.
I believe one is allowed to be concerned over a new procedures such as this, when delivered from people who can't send out a safe/card within 11 months. This is a fair concern.

So what do I do? Apparently they realize they are idiots so they have a back up plan.

If you do not have an electronic safe/card, find 2 friends that do.

1) Have each friend go to their logon site and select "trusted friend"
2) Each will use their safe/card to get a message delivered to them
3) Each use will print out the file and give it to you (the files cannot be mailed).
4) You have 1 hour to logon with the two files as you single password.

Are you kidding me?

Are there 2 people that have safe/cards in my group. Yes. There are. Ther are 2. The 12 people managers that need new passwords will all go to these 2 people for their passwords.

1 is in Hawaii for 2 weeks.

Speaking of head up your butt moves, did anyone see the Bruins tear their own heart out on TV last Saturday. It was sad and pathatic and no one would go out with me to drown my sorrows.

Friday, October 22, 2004

A Potpourri of Topics

1. Like a Bad Fart...

While driving into work today I have noticed that a lot of new plays in LA are the second half of analogies. There is "Like a Fish Without a Bicycle" (from the "Woman without a man is...". There is a new play opening call "Like a Dog on linoleum" (from the can't get traction analogy). It is a bad trend. Emotional shorthand used to hook into a current cultural phenomea is like a bad fart, a lot of noise, smell and waving of hands - but very little real relief.

2. We Can't Vote in the Presidential Election, but we will make our voices heard

Actually we can vote in the Presidential election, but we are going to Kerry. Because all of California hates Bush. I don't mean that in an active way, just more esoterically like Annette hates Sushi or Ed hates Michigan. It doesn't normally effect, but we feel it the same.

So, how can California tell Bush to sod off? Voting for Kerry isn't enough. It is our one day to make our voice heard. We are voting on Proposition 73. To fund Stem Cell research to the tune of $3 Billion. No one wants to spend the money, but everyone wants to tell Bush that we are still here. And we still hate you. Oh yea, and let's cure some disease.

3. You can go to Mexico

So this morning on the radio they were talking about how people are going to Canada or Mexico to get flu shots. Apparently exactly the same vaccine we use is for use there. People in Brownsville are flooding over the river to, I kid you not, Rose-Maria's Restaurant and Pharamcia. Will you want in line, you can have a Taco Plate.

Wednesday, October 20, 2004

Two things...

1. It is raining a lot in LA. Not so bad. But the pooches HATE the rain. You all know that (I have discussed this). Last night they refused to go out and pee. Simply refused. So we threatened them with death and finally let them go to bed knowing there would be a night-time issue.

There was not. The dogs held it all night. This morning, back outside - still raining hard. Finally after much Scott in a towel in the front yard screaming "pee! Pee! You can't come in until you pee!", Hastings found the closet thing to pee on (the Chimera) just one step off the rocks, and partially under the overhang.

Ashford refused even that. He simply stood on the step, raised his leg and try to shoot it across the rocks the chimera. Thy ran back in quickly and are now in bed with Ed.

2. Anthony Villagirosa. He was my state assemblyman in Larchmont. He was a great guy. And he ran for Mayor versus dumb-as-stick (and current Mayor) Jim Hahn. Well Mayor Jimmy has an asinine plan for expanding LAX. Ass-e-9. (Moving all the check in an 1/2 mile away into one building to make the 9 terminals less tempting targets for car bombers - hello, doesn't that make the new check-in terminal a, oh I don't know, a HUGE target!)

So Anthony is against the plan (as all the candidates are - this is kind of an every 4 year argument on why the current mayor should be kicked out). But last night, Anthony - my guy - says that what LA needs is not a bigger airport, but a regional airport like Chicago has with Midway.

Wow, that's a great idea! Great! We should put one in the Valley and call it, oh I don't know, Burbank Airport. Or we could put one 10 miles south at that old McDonald-Douglas factory. We could call it, ummmmm Long Beach Airport. Or, let's go crazy, put one out where Riverside / San Bernardino is growing. What would we call that how about Ontario International. There are also a lot of people in Anaheim, Santa Ana, Irvine. It's too bad they don't' have an airport down there in Orange County.

IDIOT. We have 4 regional working airports in addition to LAX. And you what, the LA Airport Authority OWNS TWO OF THEM.

Monday, October 18, 2004

Funniest Lady

Okay, here's the poopski. You all know that Gavin and Mickey are GREAT friends of ours (they haven't called us lately - but I am hoping that is just because they are lazy like us, not angry).

Any who... One of Mickey's best freinds is Suzzanne. She is working towards being an actress. She is consistantly one of the funnest people I know - in a quick positive way - not the Scooter quick cutting way.

For example (skip if you have heard this story like a million times...) We were all at a freind's house who has a show on lifetime. It was a beautiful house and we are all taking the tour (as you do), wandering through the place. Her bedroom was this gorgeous old dark teak furniture, with a view of the city and a throne of a bed. One of those huge 4 poster numbers, with the netting over the top to give it a tropical feel.

As Eddie and I walk out, we meet Suzzane in the hall. We say, "Beautiful bedroom." She answers without a pause, "Yea, shame about the mesquitos though." Okay it doesn't read funny, but she has a quick throwaway wit and doesn't wait for a response if it isn't needed.

So Scott, what's the point. Well, she was in this silly VH1 Search for the New Partridge Family. You know she got to the final 8, then talent people cut it down based on singing and acting to 5, then to 3, then America voted to 2. Then last night they picked the new Shirley. And it is Suzzane.

Great Job. Of course, they are making her look a little older in the show.
From he web site.



From VH1

Sunday, October 17, 2004

Faith the Badger

Well, of course Ed's niece Faith is a Minnesota fan (fyi - hummed yesterday). She doesn't like the Badgers - she likes Goldie Gopher.

But it wasn't always that way.


You Wouldn't Pull That Crapon Annette...

It's a line from Grease, the movie - which was rated like G so I refuse to get in too much trouble for it. Anyways, Annette - Ed's cousin was out this week end.

We had fun. She has two kids, so while she was fancy free we took her drinking and to see Team Amercia.



Team America was good, but it was no South Park; Bigger, Longer and Uncut. In fact we were overhyped for it.

But afterwards we went out and had drinks with Ronnie Roo and Bradley-san so it was a lot of fun.

Of course, as when ever anyone from back east comes out, the weather was crapola. She got in the cab (at 5:15!) in pouring rain.

Friday, October 15, 2004

The 3rd Person.. and Earthquakes

Occasionally the use of the third person - when discussing yourself- in conversation makes sense (as in "Scott, what are you thinking?" I hear you ask yourselves. Actually maybe that isn't 3rd person, but 2nd person. But I thought second person would be "What is one thinking?" - any who...)

Occasionally the use of the third person- when discussing yourself- in conversation makes sense. But these times are few and far between. These times are not on Survivor, unless you want to sound crazy to your comrades (forced freindships though they are).

However, if one must use the third person, use your real name. As in "Travis is getting sick of the food here."

Rather than a name which, while perhaps pleasent enough in Married-to-Your-Cousin Kentucky, sounds odd to a national TV audiences. As in "Buba done had enough Plantains."

Last night Buba, as sick of Plantains as we are of his Bob Barker T-Shirt, was sent home by the women folk. In retrospect, maybe it was about more than the use of the 3rd person.



PS to anyone who happend to catch the episode (and there are fewer all the time - I know it jumped the shark). If you happen to get "caught" in an earthquake, get under something solid or away from things that might fall. Do not, as they did on Survivor, scream and run around like a chicken with your head cut off.

The ground is moving, where do you think you are running to? It won't last forever, the earth is moving a little, it will stop.

Looking around, instinctually looking for the big rig that has just crash through you house, is acceptable. To do so for an hour aterwards while screaming is just silly.

And as for the famous "running in a circle to get it to stop" is rather fruitless. The earht will settle down whether you run around in a circle or not.

Thursday, October 14, 2004

Patti's Wedding - Scott and the Matron

I love that word, Matron of Honor. I picture a prison guard in my mind. I mean I expect the unattractive slouch, the stripes and the ciggy butt hanging out one side of her mouth, saying something like, "You want the ring. Come and get it!"

But that was not the case at Patti's wedding. The Matron of Honor was her sister - married a couple of years early. She was very busy early in the evening, but she and I relaxed later in the day. She and I and my good friend Jack, Jack Daniels.




Speaking of Nincompoopery

As you know, Eddie and I thought "Manhunt - the Search for the Most non-Queeny Male Model" was going to be horrible. It would make us feel bad about ourselves.

Well, surprise. It was dreadfully entertaining. Turns out there is very little more fun that watching walking - talking - ripped Ken dolls make absolutely clear they are dolts. Idiots. Nincompoops - if I may.

And, while professing their straight-hood, the host (this older daddy type) walks out and yells "Line up and Strip!". Then makes fun of their underwear. It was like bad porn.

Then they make the models strip all the way (artfully blurred) and put on tight Calvin Klein (product placement) boxer-briefs with black combat boots. And then jump out of a plane with a man on their back. It seemed like someone's idea of homo-erotic, but so didn't work with an fully clothed, not too cute instructor on their back. But they did look like idiots again!



Wednesday, October 13, 2004

TSA - Overworked and Underpaid

So I am driving in today to work and I get a good chuckle.

The security screeners at airports are quitting (or being fired) at the rate of about 20 - 25% a year. They believe they are overworked and underappreciated.

Really? You think you're overworked?

Let me say that I have traveled a lot this year and summer. You are most certainly not overworked. You know how I know? Because there are 6 of you around every one working machine and only 1 of you works.

Story - Eddie and I left LA the other morning and the guy at the x-ray machines asks Suzzie "I got better things to do than listen to you" Screener for a bag check. Miss Suzzie ignores him. Again he says, "Bag Check!".

Meanwhile, the line is backing up. Suzzie is studiously looking everywhere but at the x-ray machine. She will not turn. Finally someone in line yells, and Suzzie whips her ass around to see who said something. Everyone shuts up, because Suzzie will kick you off the plane - don't screw with Suzzie. She mozies down the 4 feet to the x-ray machine in a cool 40 seconds.

"What?" she says.

Now Suzzie really only has one job here. A bag check. Why this requires an explanation is beyond me. But the x-ray guy explains it to her. Her cow-like gum chewing and exhausted sighing lets me know that Suzzie has been through this before. The large gentlemen in line says, "Those are drum sticks", Suzzie holds up her hand. She is in charge her. "Sir, will you step back please."

He steps back, also sighing and looking put-upon. Suzzie is in for a fight with this one. He is a big black gentlemen, but Suzzie matches his ass pound for pound - and she has better eye-rolling and a better weave. After all, she has all day to practice the eye-rolling (and I think she does her weave during bathroom breaks).

With Suzzie and the drummer moved 2 inches away, the rest of the line is allowed to do the shoeless, beltless shuffle through - at the rate of 1 person every 2 minutes. By the time Eddie and I are through, putting our shoes and belts back on, Suzzie has about 20 drumsticks out of the bag, and removing the remainder one at a time. How do I know it was about 20. Cuz Suzzie is counting, "Eight..tain," pick it out and put it in a stack, "Night..tain" pick it out and put it in the stack, "Twenty" move that stack down, reach into the bag and guess what is there? What could that be. It's another drumstick. Suzzie studies it from all angles, until she is sure that this one isn't a stick of dynamite, "Twenty.. *sigh* ..one."

Overworked! PU-leez. If Suzzie had to do a real job for twenty minutes he butt would be on the street so quickly it would make your head spin.

Tucson and Missoula are the same story, but they appear to hire only 60 year old ex-marines who huff and puff better than the Suzzies of this world.

Friday, October 08, 2004

Are you kidding me!!!

Hello world gone nucking futs.

I am so glad that many people explained I was crazy when I said this government would do antyhing to get elected. ANYTHING! Including lying about the terror threat level. "Oh no," people said, "That is Micheal Moore fantasy."

Well yesterday the Homeland security department issue an terror alert to schools. It seems there were school plans, exits and floor plans found in Iraq. Everything but Dick Cheny in a Chicken Little Suit screaming, "The Terrorists Are Going To KILL Your Children - Don't Vote For Kerry!!!"

Today. Turns out they were foudn on an Iraq computer from someone that is helping to set up schools. Don't believe. Here is the CNN Link. And here is the money paragraph.

The Homeland Security official said the material was associated with a specific individual in Iraq, and it could not be established that this man had any ties to terrorism. He did have a connection to civic groups doing planning for schools in Iraq, the official said.

And when was this information released? On a Friday. Just like the hike in Medicare Costs. Or the news about the FBI investigation of an administration leak of a CIA agent. Or the information that the administration's Drug Plan was underestimated by $1BILLION - and they knew it all along. Thank god they aren't really trying to bury the information.


Eds works late, Scott Pub Crawls

It isn't a fair world. We all know that.

My poor Eddid has been in New York meeting on Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. Through the first two days he was leaving work until after midnight. While it can sound glamerous (Ed's in a conference on the 50th floor at 30 Rockefeller Center preparing for NBC) - it is not pleasent.

It probably didn't help that he called last night and I just got back from a little "pub crawl".

Well, not a pub crawl as there are no pubs in Hollywood, but a "lounge crawl". Unfortunately Bradly and I did not hit the magic time when it isn't too crowdy or too empty. We went to Tokio (Japanese Sushi-Kareoki Bar gone Jetson's) and shared the place with 5 other people. We walked into White Lotus where a HUGE LOUD MAGAZINE PARTY WAS GOING ON. WE BREEZED IN (PAST SECURITY), BUT IT WAS TOO LOUD AND WANNA-BE TO REALLY BE ENJOYABLE SO WE LEFT. We then walked to Daddy's - a sweet slice of red naugahide and nice music. Again which we shared with 4 people. The drinks (burbon and diet coke) were a great burbon, but apparently they were out of Diet Coke, because neither Bradly or I seemed to to get any mixer. But it was a nice big glass of Jack Daniels.

Well, Eddie was going to fly home tongiht and directly to Palm Springs. But, his meeting was pushed back so now he comes into LA late. I will await him and make him feel better. Because that is what I do.

Thursday, October 07, 2004

Asford vs. Alqueda

Oye', the Presidential race is worrying me. Oye', what will happen to the future. Oye', why does God hatie Florida.

Well, enough worry about the "big things" - Ashford pulled my ass back to reality. Last night I was painting the bathroom. Ed is out of town and I thoguht I would suprise him with a newly painted bathroom (because apparently my being in Thailand and Hong Kong didn't give him enoguh time to paint - but I digress). I was finally done and ready to put up the wall plates and all, when Ashford wanted to go out front.

Ashford gets this wild hair every now and then. He goes out front and wanders along the gate. Looks at life passing by. He barks at the other dogs. He enjoys life out there.

Last night he enjoyed barking at the black and white wierd dog. The black and white dog, turned out to be a skunk. Now the skunk was outside the gate, but still wanted Ashford to know he didn't enjoy being barked at.

Yes, last night at 10:30 I was busy (in my newly painted bathroom) washing the skunk smell out of the little fat brown dog. fun. He's at the groomer today.

Oye'.

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

Mutilated Heads - PG, Puppet Sex - X

Are you kidding me? The finally cut enough "puppet sex" out of Team America to get an R.

Bear with me here. Here is a note from the MPAA.org site:


Alien vs. Predator
PG-13
Rated PG-13 for violence, language, horror
images, slime and gore.



Violence, horror images - PG13
Puppet Sex - X (toned down to an R)

Really people - have we not gone crazy enough? (FYI - Sneak preview on Saturday Night. B there or B sq.)



Shut up shut up shut up shut up

Oh my god, please make the candidates shut up. There is no story they will not spin. No truth they won't stretch. No tiny bit of patriotism they wont' try to twist into hate of their opponent. Why don't Americans vote. Because politicians are vile pieces of scum and we wish with all our might they are not really indiciative of us as a people.

Take this "Global Test" bullshit for instance.

I can't take it. Uncle! You have convinced me that you are all scum.

Congratulations. From this campign I have learned that Vietnam heros are liars (it is not clear if all Vietnam Vets are or are not). That disagreeing with the President during a "war" is treason (that was noted during the open ended war on terror - not the Iraq war).

I have learned that car bombs killing hundres of Iraqs a week is progress. I learned that going into the National Guard is just an excuse to party (myself, I don't think the brave guard troops in Iraq feel that way - but what is reality seems not to matter to our candidates).

In short, I have learned that you will say anything, do anything, exploit any tradgity, play off any fear, flame any hatred in order to get elected the most powerful man in the world.

I have learned, in short, our president (whom ever it is that wins this election) is amoral. I would not be friends with him. If he were tied to the train tracks and a train was coming I would wish that his running mate and opponent and Karl Rove were right there with him.

And our "news media" were a bit farther down the tracks.

A great lesson to teach our kids.

Tuesday, October 05, 2004

Priest Joke

Not a priest that is a joke, a joke from a Priest.

During Patti and Jay's wedding, the priest was great. He talked about love and commitment and everything. He then, seamlessly, sequayed into a joke. So God created Eve as a companion to Adam so that he may know both emotional and physical love. And Adam looked on her and was amazed. He fairly cried unto God, "Oh Lord, why have you made her so beautiful, so sweet so calm of voice and warm of heart."

And God said, "So you will love her, Adam."

And Adam found this good. Eve was beautiful. She was caring. She was everything he dreamed her to be. Almost. Adam, hesitant for he might anger God, said quietly, "Oh Lord, Eve is fair and kind, but why did you make her so dumb?"

And God said, "So she can love you, Adam."

You rarely get a Catholic Priest who interrupts the stand up, sit down, kneel, fight, fight, fight for a good old joke. FYI - I miss the Latin. I mean I am not Catholic or anything, but when my mom married her second husband we went to a real catholic church. Knees, doilys on the ladies heads, and the words in Latin. Easy to sleep through.

Monday, October 04, 2004

Nice Week-end

We had a nice time in Chicago last week-end. We stayed at the Swiss Hotel in the city with a view of Navy Pier out one window and the new Milleium Park out of the other. The weather was really sunny. Not really warm, but really sunny - so that was cool.

Patti's wedding was nice.

Not so nice when they called us to come down and have a little cocktail afterwards. I roused Eddie from bed and we went down. Only to find Alex hurrying upstairs saying, "go help Jo-Anne out of the car. She's sick." So we hurry to help the Matron of Honor. Ed's gift for his trouble. A nice Bloomidales bag of barf.

Once disposed of, and Jo-Ann cleaned up, we had a good night of drinking, laughing and making fun of people's feet.

And Another Thing

Congrats to those guys that took a private space ship up and back twice. I like that.

Sunday, October 03, 2004

Patti and Jay's Wedding

Well, another week-end, another wedding. This was tres nicey. We had a great time in Tinley Park and Chicago. I will share more later, but here is a link for those that want to see the pix.


Thursday, September 30, 2004

Zeigfried & Roy?

October Mascot. Zeigfreid und Roy. Check it out.

Not Nincompoopery

See, there is too much that is not Nincompoopery right now. I know that. The bombings in Baghdad. The scripted debate tonight. But I don't want to dwell on it in my mind.

So back to men. I thought about why that dumb ass Bravo show works my nerves, and I have it figured out (was there a question). It is because men are sexy as do-ers, not as posers.

Even when do-ers pose (say Jeremy Bloom below), then they can be sexy. Jeremy Bloom is a World Champion Freestyle Skier, and (until the NCAA bounced him) a Punt Returner for Univ of Colorado. Hot.



This is a poster of posers. Not hot. Cute, granted, but not hot.



And the do-ers don't have to be buff, just do-ers. Guys who work for a living to support the family. That is why women are suckers for dads or men with puppies. Not only are they "doing" their normal job, they are taking on extra jobs. That is why the Fed Ex man is a turn on for some people.

So the Bravo show will get a tune in value, but then people will turn it off. Unless there is mean nasty back-stabbing. Because, while it is not pleasant, at least they are doing something.

Wednesday, September 29, 2004

Some Stuff

If you missed “Yield for Princess”, you must read the entry below first.

Breathy
So there is this ad on the radio. It sounds like bad breathy male porn. I say bad because a man should not try to be “breathy”. That slightly out of breath sound should always come from a woman. Breathy woman – hot. Breathy man – gross. And he talks quietly and sultry (which is implied from breathy) and he says, “Do you know the 3 most exciting words in the English language.” Given the way it was delivered, I was worried. See, not only was it breathy, he had a little lisp. Great, I thought, some bad homo ad. Immediately you assume it is I love you, but given the questioner, I was afraid we were going to skate on thin ice here. But no! Apparently the three most exciting words in the language are Walters Mercedes Benz. May I suggest that, a) they really aren’t all that exciting and b) if you are advertising for Walters Mercedes Benz you should really get someone who doesn’t have a lisp.

We aren’t pieces of meat!
Really, I am all for the objectification of men. I bow to no one in my enjoyment of a little nakidity. But really, isn’t Bravo going a little far. They are having “Manhunt, the Search for America’s Most Gorgeous Male Model.” And, in case you couldn’t figure out the target audience, when I right clicked the picture below to save it and share with you, it was titled “homo_promo3_ph.jpg”. Hummmm


Come on, don’t I feel fat enough?

Yield for Princess

Here are some guidelines if you actually want a bumper sticker on your car that says “Yield for Princess”.
1 – Do not put it on a Sentra. A princess would not drive a Sentra. I am not sure a princess would drive any Nissan – but definitely not a Sentra.
2 – If you are a princess that shops in the “big and tall” section of junior miss AND you are not tall, then dress appropriately. Most princesses would not be sitting in a Sentra, wearing a size 22 blue frilly baby-doll top.
3 – If you must drive a Sentra, wear a size 22 blue baby doll blouse and wait at the on-ramp light, then realize that other people will be next to you, taking a gander at the princess. Don’t pick your nose.
4 – If you must pick your nose (and sometimes you do), please do not shove it in to the knuckle, then remove your pudgy little finger at inspect it for boogers.
5 – If you must inspect it, do so from one angle, don’t turn it around in the light. It’s not a diamond.
6 – When complete, a princess would discretely put her hand below window level until the light turns green and she can dispose of it with no one watching. She would not flick it across the front seat to the passenger side of the car. Even if the car was a Sentra.

Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Happy Dogs

So on Saturday, after we returned from Tiffany's Wedding, we went in the Jacquizi and took in Hastings. It was a hot hot day, and the Jacquizi was not hot, but coolish. Rather than be annoyed by the water (like usual) he sat on my knees and took a snooze in the water. He is just like me!

But the weird thing was after the Jacquizi, he acted like a puppy for about 30 minutes. He was bouncy, and jumped around. He was playful and his joints felt better. Eddie played tug-of-war with him for a while (I took Ashford outside and we played fetch). He was like a kid again. It was cool.

He has slept pretty much since then, but it was a fun half hour.

Manic Depressive

Every so often, I worry. My grandfather was a really smart, really nice man. He was head of the Pyschology Department of Chapman University before he retired. He has since passed away.

He was also Manic-Depressive (since termed BiPolar - and over used). When he had a good day he was a bright, funny, smart guy. On a bad day he was a bastard.

When I wake up and have a bad morning driving to work - I worry that I have inherited this from him. It's one of those weird things that you can't diagnose yourself. So I have to hope that Ed doesn't get too annoyed with me and can point it out. I know that over the years I have annoyed enough friends with it.

Here is the odd thing, what if it gets worse as I get older? It's bad enough to have some great days and some lousy days now - but what if the lousy days get worse as I get older? How will I know.

I don't like things like that. And I figure it must be that with me know. I mean there is no possible way that Kerry and Bush are as big of idiots as I think. Can anyone really believe that Kerry and Bush are the best we can do? It must be me. I must be going crazy.

Monday, September 27, 2004

My Little Sister's Wedding

My little sister got married Saturday (you have a little sister? - yes). It was a quick trip out to Laughlin (NV) for Eddie and I . The pictures are at Ofoto.


Thursday, September 23, 2004

The Clarion

A return to last week-end.

So after a night on the train, two hours late to get to our hotel, we are greeted at 10:45 at the Clarion Inn and "Suites" by Robert.

Robert has been given the blue overcoat of shift supervisor. He is short-ish, seemingly well-muscled and a lot of queenie attitude. Not what you want after a trip on the train. His little hairs were slicked forward, and then turned up at the last minute. His little green thumb ring didn't match his little blue blazer. And he says to us, "Can I help you?"

"We have a reservation, Neppl."

With this, Robert does a slow, exaggerated turn to the clock - where it says 10:45. He arches one eyebrow and says, "Check in time is 3:oo."

"We were told it was possible to get an early check-in."

"It's possible...." he says and then waits a beat, "but not guaranteed." I see Ed's hands in front of the counter ball into fists - he unclenches them with work. Robert continues in his own sweet time, "Let me see."

Tick tick tick. I notice a moldy smell about the place. I notice that only one elevator is worked. I notice that we are in the "Theatre" district - which is Tucsonian for crappy part of town where the drunks piss on the sidewalk. Robert must notice Ed and I looking around. If we wait until 3PM, we will find a different hotel.

"Well," Robert says, snapping us back to his little reality, "You're lucky. Room 430."

I get Ed into the one working elevator before he physically assaults Robert. The elevator carpet is squishy with who knows what (actually the next day we saw multiple beers spilt on the carpet - so I guess we know what makes it squishy.

It is an 8 story hotel, but no one went above the 4th floor. I think it was condemned higher. It should have been condemned on the 4th floor too. The bathroom fan didn't work. No big deal, but it was right above the toilet, so as you stood there you could see into the dust and mold and varmits - while you were pee'ing. Pleasant.

Ed moved the washcloth to wash his face, and there was a hole in the counter, like someone had put a hammer through the countertop. The washcloths had cleverly covered it. and no one in this city would ever use a washcloth.

In the middle of the night both Ed and I had dreams about that ultra-violet investigation on 20/20 - and we just tried to ignore it.

In the middle of the night Ed got water from the ice bucket, and in the morning he went to get more, but notice a fuzzy thing in the bucket. He freaked out. I explained to him it was a lemon I had drunkenly put in the night before.

It wasn't a lemon, but I thought for a little while he might actually throw up if I didn't distract him. So harmless white lie to get us out of the hotel. Ka-reep-ee

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

I have tried but..

I have tried, but the story of last week-end must be told in person. It was so impossibly bad that after 3 pages in Word, I just stopped trying. I will occasionally supply a random memory, but the full trip must be experienced through Ed's recount.

However, let me say that it was interesting to go from Hong Kong to LA to the train so quickly. I handled it very well, until the next morning after coffee and a crappy Amtrak breakfast. We got back to our room, and the plastic bathroom and suddenly my insides exploded.

I went into the bathroom and proceed to make noises and smells that would kill small children and drawfs (little people - whatever). So as I am sitting in this tiny room, know that Ed and our neighbors could here everything - the porter knocks. "Going to clean up the room, "he says.

I yell to Ed "Noooo!", but the porter doesn't care. He has been doing this 32 years so don't worry. So I am in the crapper, in the throws of death, revisiting breakfast, Hong Kong and maybe Thailand and Eddie is trying to talk to the porter to give me a second to pull it together. Now I have the trots and I am trying to hurry. Eddie and I leave and the Porter makes up the room and we go to an empty room to wait.

I am embarrassed beyound belief. I mean, I know there isn't anything I can do about it. And better the porter than me or Ed. But still. I am afraid the old porter is going keel over. "Headline: 32 year veteran of the rails killed by smell from compartment E. Perpetrator still at large."

I gave him a $20 tip.

Monday, September 20, 2004

In the list of bad ideas

In the list of bad ideas, taking the train to Tucson, watching a football game in a monsoon and staying at the red-tagged Clarion Hotel ranks right up there with putting ice down Mike Tyson's shorts. It's such a bad idea that eventually you have to laugh.

I haven't the time to really write it all down now, but I have put up the pictures and you may step through them with captions. I think I have set it so you no longer have to sign into Ofoto.

Just go to this site.

Just forshadowing here is a pic of us during the 88 minute rain delay.



Wednesday, September 15, 2004

A Dinner with a View

Last night - for our last night, Christina and I went to dinner at a Neuvo Chinese. It was the partner of the first Hong Kong rstaurant I went to and loved. This one had food just as great, but was on the mainland side of the city.

We are great food onthe 28th floor, at the window overlooking the Hong Kong skyline across the bay. Hong Kong skyscrapers have "light shows"at night. I don't know how else to describe it. The enon aroud the buildings change colors, the windows make patterns (like running men or one building that scrolled "Welcome to Hong Kong" in English). One of hte very tall buildings even had lasers that shoot out across the sky. Since it hs been foggy and humid, it looked great.

Since we had both worked all day I did not feel guilty at all. It was a great night. I head back home today in about 7 hours. I am looking forward to going home.

Tuesday, September 14, 2004

Biding my time

Well, the Taipai part of our trip was cancelled so I am in Hong Kong today. It is odd. I am working all day and getting a ton done without distractions. I am down here in business center to get some mail from wokr and contact others.

But, while waiting, I found a picture of the house the American built in bangkok (I am pretty sure I let you know). This CIA (OSS at the time) guy fell in love with the people and architecture. He pulled 6 different local houses and combined them to build his house. It is very cool.


I also thought I would share one picture I pulled off the net of the Thailand royal Palace. It was started by Ram 1 - and occupied through Ram 6. Ram 4 (the one in the King and I) built part of it that is much more Westernized. FYI- The King and I is banned here, but everyone has seen a bootleg copy.


I am alone in Asia

I am all alone here. Leave Scooter a little "hello" comment.

A full day in Hong Kong

We arrived today in Hong Kong at 1:30 P (actually we arrived at like noon - but after getting through cusotms, immigration, to the hoetl and what not it was 1:30) - and we started our meetings at 2:30 - we worked until 7PM and it was a good set of meetings.

And I am funny. It didn't hit me when I joked a lot during the meeting and people laughed. I mean that is normal and not odd. But I am kind of a boss, so people laugh now a lot - even when they don't get my jokes.

Okay - so background - when I am around non-English speakers, I tend to talk differently. I talk a little slower, I use less vocabulary and try to use their adjective / noun / verb structure. So I actively try to change my style (actually the word "actively" may be pushing it - I change my style with very little effort, it kind of just happens). Well today I was discussing a Master Card initiative (stop snoring Eddie). Anyway, I want to say MC isusing a carrot and stick approach, but I realized that the colloquism wouldn't translate well. So I said push / pull and stammered for a while. Finally a woman from the Philippines said, "You mean incentive."

And I replied, "Right!!!! Thank you, I couldn't think of the word." I then looked at the Hong Kongers and said, "I wish English was my first language." They laughed and laughed, and one guy had a little coffee come through his nose, so I know it was really funny - they weren't just being polite. I mean politie is polite, but you don't push coffee through your nose just to be nice. Even in Hong Kong.